He who decides the fate of man.


As any look is possible for God, he choses to portray the classic Judeo-Christian look, by sauntering around in a white robe with flowing white locks, and a wizened beard. He also like to manifest himself about the height of 14 dragons stacked end to end.


For millennia, God sat on his throne, discontent with a furrowed brow. He let out a sigh to express his boredom. Looking around, he saw that he was alone and pulled out his iphone. “Hmm.” It appeared that the devil hadn’t healed up from the ass-beating God threw on him this morning. What’s a God to do?

“I know!” He snapped. “I’ll create a planet for mucking about and playing around to pass my time. I’ll fill it full of adventures, monsters, and vampires… lots of fucking vampires. Then I’ll orchestrate the adventures of said beasties on random chance, a throw of the die whist I sit back, have a stogie and enjoy!”

On the first day God did push-ups so that he’d look all hella-swoll for those who look up to him.
On the second day he enjoyed some fine Irish whiskey. It’s best to not rush into these things.
On the third day he created the world and all the creatures in it.
On the fourth day he rocked the hell out of Satan again and dressed him up in women’s clothes.
On the fifth day he made sweet love to his favorite sex robot.
On the sixth day he put more vampires into the world. He then danced to the killer untz.
On the seventh day he grinned as he rolled the dice. And the people rejoiced.


Attacking the Darkness! vurcease MasterSlade